You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
