white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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