Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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