on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
