Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Randomize
