Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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