I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
