I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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