You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Randomize