You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
false alarm, still single
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
