my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
