Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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