we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
