Do you still have your period?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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