Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
