Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.