If i come over, it means nothing
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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