Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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