i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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