I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
