so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
