better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
