his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
