There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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