Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
