the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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