Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Randomize
