you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize