i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize