What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
