She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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