Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.

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  (586): I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face. http://tfl.nu/07yz
  Replies (3) Good night (2844) Bad night (732)
• Favorite

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident

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  (906): Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident http://tfl.nu/3vk6
  Replies (5) Good night (674) Bad night (1194)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods

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  (313): Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods http://tfl.nu/gefu
  Replies (3) Good night (618) Bad night (865)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car

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  (516): i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car http://tfl.nu/yqns
  Replies (27) Good night (1288) Bad night (5619)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."

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  (612): the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear." http://tfl.nu/uaxy
  Replies (19) Good night (9270) Bad night (913)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!

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  (513): the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS! http://tfl.nu/o380
  Replies (49) Good night (3132) Bad night (5113)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.

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  (978): he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/v7b4
  Replies (16) Good night (1482) Bad night (7345)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.

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  (412): He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead. http://tfl.nu/inh1
  Replies (18) Good night (1150) Bad night (3121)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.

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  (631): Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl. http://tfl.nu/065k
  Replies (13) Good night (1416) Bad night (2651)
• Favorite

  (325): View more from Texas

  You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...

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  (325): You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis... http://tfl.nu/1zk4
  Replies (6) Good night (1064) Bad night (923)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.

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  (601): You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass. http://tfl.nu/96n6
  Replies (7) Good night (2230) Bad night (379)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.

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  (845): So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love. http://tfl.nu/55s3
  Replies (5) Good night (1086) Bad night (189)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.

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  (847): I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents. http://tfl.nu/keo7
  Replies (6) Good night (424) Bad night (248)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help

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  (727): I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help http://tfl.nu/aa2d
  Replies (4) Good night (291) Bad night (208)
• Favorite

  (320): View more from Minnesota

  For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie

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  (320): For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie http://tfl.nu/swy2
  Replies (2) Good night (584) Bad night (159)

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