I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
