Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
