after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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