i just google imaged poop.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
