She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Holy shit dude........stairs
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