You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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