He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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