Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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