i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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