The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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