I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
