I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
