No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
