I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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