we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize