Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Randomize
