the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
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We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something