he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
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