Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
