when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Randomize
