i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
